Squiz Today / 10 November 2023

Squiz Today – Friday, 10 November

%%=Format(@localdatetime, “dddd, d MMMM yyyy”)=%%

Squiz Today Podcast

Today’s listen time: 9.30 minutes

17 / 27
13 / 31
18 / 26
16 / 40
11 / 24
13 / 27
26 / 32
10 / 28

Squiz Sayings

“I was completely shocked, and then I started laughing, like, this is a joke, right? I’ve always been the bridesmaid!” 

Said a bewildered Patrick Dempsey after was named People’s 2023 Sexiest Man Alive. He’s best known for playing Dr McDreamy on the noughties medical drama Grey’s Anatomy. Rumours that China’s vote was for Australia’s ‘handsome boy’ could not be verified…

Calling Optus for answers…

The Squiz

After a bruising day of criticism and scrutiny, Optus announced its make-good offer after its national network outage on Wednesday that left 10 million customers and 400,000 businesses up the creek without a phone or Wi-Fi connection for 14 hours. Consumer and small business customers will get 200 gigabytes of bonus data, while prepaid customers will get unlimited data on weekends until the end of the year. Off the table – monetary compensation. CEO Kelly Bayer Rosmarin also explained what was behind the outage. She said that “a network event” caused by a faulty router update triggered “a cascading failure” across the telco’s “multiple layers of fall back and redundancy” [insert shrugging lady emoji…]. 

Will that fix things? 

Unlikely… Communications Minister Michelle Rowland announced a review into what caused the Optus blackout and how a repeat could be avoided. She also confirmed the communications regulator will investigate emergency triple-zero calls going down on Optus landlines, saying it’s “critical that industry and governments take stock following large-scale outages”. Adding to that, a Greens-led Senate Inquiry has been launched – it wants boss Kelly Bayer Rosmarin to front up and explain the company’s handling of the saga. And as businesses report that the outage cost them a pretty penny, Chamber of Commerce boss Andrew McKellar called the company’s response on the day and afterwards a “clown show” and reckons monetary compensation would be fair. Reports say the Telecommunications Industry Ombudsman could direct Optus to pay up to $100,000 in compensation to business customers and $1,500 to individuals. 

So there’s a bit going on…

Yep, and that’s not all… Reports say fed-up Optus customers – many of whom also went through the company’s data breach saga last year – are taking their business to rival telcos. In a quirk of timing, parent company Singtel released the telco’s annual results yesterday featuring revenue and customer growth despite last year’s hack, but this week’s drama has seen questions about Bayer Rosmarin’s future at the helm resurface. Another big criticism is that the company’s response to the outage was slow and inadequate, with Bayer Rosmarin and her team accused of not learning enough from last year’s hack. With the Senate Committee’s remit to speak to the main players and its report deadline of 9 December, we’ll hear more about these issues soon…

Australian News

Squiz the Rest

Progress on pauses

In a big development overnight, Israel has agreed to put in place 4-hour daily humanitarian pauses, according to the White House. With no hope of Israel discussing a ceasefire until the 239 hostages taken on 7 October are released, the Americans said the move was a “significant first step” that would start today. As Israel continues to focus its military efforts on removing the Hamas terror group from the north of the Palestinian territory, reports say there have been short-term pauses this week as thousands of locals flee the area, and what this announcement does is formalise and expand the process. President Joe Biden had pressed the Israelis for a multi-day stoppage in the fighting in a bid to release hostages held by the militant group as talks facilitated by Qatar continue.

World News

Filling up the coffers

The Commonwealth’s coffers received a nice boost this year… Largely thanks to high resource prices, companies paid $83.8 billion in corporate income tax in the 2021-22 financial year – up 22% from the previous year and 50% the year before that. New data from the Tax Office shows it’s the first year that the resources sector paid more tax than all other sectors combined, with mining giants BHP and Rio Tinto coughing up a quarter of the total. Andrew ‘Twiggy’ Forrest’s Fortescue Metals, the Commonwealth Bank and Westpac rounded out the top 5 taxpayers. Over 800 large companies paid no tax last financial year, including Qantas, AGL and Optus parent company Singapore Telecom. That doesn’t mean they’re dodging their obligations – the tax is payable on profits, not gross income, and losses can be offset against future profits. Hate the game, not the players…

Australian News Business & Finance Economy

Planning for rain

The world’s most polluted capital is New Delhi – and locals are planning to make it rain to clear the dangerous smog that’s been choking the city. This week, the city has closed schools and halted construction, but with the dirty air not clearing, officials will ask the Supreme Court to approve cloud seeding to try to bring on some of the wet stuff today. India’s air quality levels have been off the charts, peaking at 100 times the World Health Organization’s safe level. A lot of it’s due to farmers in neighbouring areas burning their fields to prepare for crop planting – even if that’s stopped, there’s not enough wind to clear the thick/smoggy blanket. Recent research showed the 33 million people who live in the city can expect to live 12 years less because of the air they breathe…

Environment & Science World News

Legend Lanning retires

Australian cricket captain Meg Lanning has decided to hang up her international cricket boots, marking the end of a stellar career. Since her 2010 debut, Lanning has worn the green and gold 241 times and captained Australia in 182 matches. She played a hand in Australia bagging 4 T20 World Cups, a one-day World Cup, and the inaugural Commonwealth Games gold medal in 2022. There’s a reason why our women’s cricket team is considered one of the most successful in all of sports – and it happened on Lanning’s watch… Yesterday, she chucked a Barty, saying she didn’t have enough in the tank to continue at the top level. “I gave everything I had to try to do as well as I could,” she said. Speaking of Aussie sporting legends, Laura Enever has broken the women’s world record for surfing the biggest-ever paddle-in wave. At 13.3m, you wouldn’t want to be dumped…


Last chance for Taylor tix

Get ready, Swifties… New tickets for Taylor Swift’s Sydney and Melbourne Eras Tour concerts are going on sale today. Soz to make you relive the pain, but back in June, more than 4 million Aussies spent hours on Ticketek’s website trying to get their hot little hands on one of the 450,000 tickets for Swift’s 5 Aussie tour dates next February. Those who have dealt with their trauma will get another shot with tickets for her 3 Sydney shows going on sale at 10am, followed by the 2 Melbourne shows at 4pm. The system for purchasing tickets will be the same as in June, so here’s a reminder of how it works. And put this up your sleeve – hope is not lost for those who may miss out again today – Ticketek’s resale marketplace will open from 10am on Friday, 24 November. We’ll cross our fingers for you…


Friday Lites – Three things we liked this week

We couldn’t be more pumped for season 5 of Ghosts hitting ABC TV on Tuesday night next week. If you haven’t got onto this gem, seasons 1-4 are on Stan and Paramount+ – and listen closely because we can’t stress this enough… You want the British version, not the American one. It’s a comedy, it’s delightful, and it’s a no-brainer to add to your viewing list. 

We’re also pumped but trepidatious about the sixth/final season of The Crown. Split into 2 parts, the first 4 eps dealing with Diana’s demise are out next week. It reminded us of this interview Aussie actor Elizabeth Debicki did last year about inhabiting the role of the People’s Princess. Note: the video’s at the bottom of the link.

Is there anything better than a roast chook? No, there’s not… We have a fail-proof method that we make all the time, but we gave this shawarma-spiced roasted chicken recipe a go last weekend, and it’s great. Paired with some flatbread and salady-bits, it’s a yum-scrum dinner in the making.

Friday Lites

Squiz the Day

11.00am (AEDT) – State memorial service for AFL legend Ron Barassi – Melbourne

11.30pm (AEDT) – The Reserve Bank releases its quarterly statement on monetary policy

Company Results – REA Group

Company shareholder meeting – NIB Holdings

World Science Day for Peace and Development

Sesame Street Day, marking the anniversary of the premiere of children’s TV show (1969)

Anniversary of:
• the birthdays of theologian Martin Luther (1483) and actor Brittany Murphy (1977)
• the Dutch formally ceding New Netherlands (New York) to the English (1674)
• German engineer Gottlieb Daimler unveiling the world’s first motorcycle (1885)

And it’s a birthday for The Squiz’s farter-in-chief, Tucker

Squiz the Day

The Squiz Archive

Want to check out Squiz Today from the archive?

Get the Squiz Today newsletter

It's a quick read and doesn't take itself too seriously. Get on it.