Squiz Today / 07 February 2022

Squiz Today – Monday, 7 February

%%=Format(@localdatetime, “dddd, d MMMM yyyy”)=%%

Squiz Today Podcast

Helping you get your arms around it. 

Today’s listen time: 9 minutes

18 / 25
15 / 29
19 / 28
22 / 33
16 / 24
12 / 23
24 / 31
11 / 22

Squiz Sayings

“There’s a shortfall of about £5 million in what it brings back in through advertising.”

Said a spokesman from UK network Channel 5, which provides the funding for Aussie TV icon Neighbours to be made. With the numbers no longer working, the show could be bust. Financing… Everybody needs good financing.

And they’re back…

As our federal politicians make their way to Canberra for the first week of parliament this election year, the Coalition Government is in crisis.

Sure, the hyperbole can be OTT when it comes to talking about politics, but it’s not every day that the Deputy PM offers to resign after calling the PM “a hypocrite and a liar”. That’s what Nationals leader Barnaby Joyce said of his Liberal counterpart Scott Morrison early last year. Seeking to explain on Saturday, Joyce said: “My view from the backbench about the Prime Minister was based on the assumption of common knowledge, more than a one-on-one working relationship.” Yikes… And he said his offer to go was knocked back by Morrison. The Coalition has a dose of the leaks ATM with another exchange exposed last week describing Morrison as a “horrible person” and a “complete psycho”. Speaking at the incredibly timed i4Give Day service yesterday, Morrison said forgiveness is the answer. But Labor’s Treasury spokesman Jim Chalmers says the Coalition “is a smouldering ruin of disunity, dysfunction and division”, and that means the concerns of Aussies are being overlooked.

In truth, we can expect more drama on the Coalition’s internal issues this week. But there are 3 other things going on:

• Omicron is creating “terrible challenges” in the aged care sector, Morrison says. He’s asked for a plan for Defence Force personnel to be mobilised to help. And Labor is gunning for Aged Care Services Minister Richard Colbeck to resign.

• The National Security Committee of Cabinet meets today to consider opening our borders to international tourists. More health advice is needed, but it’s a green light that’s “very close,” Home Affairs Minister Karen Andrews said yesterday.

• And the Coalition and Labor are getting on the same page when it comes to the new religious discrimination laws. It’s on this week’s list of business before the House of Reps and Senate.


Squiz the Rest

Residents flee blazes in the south of Western Oz

A man is in a critical condition in hospital, and at least 5 homes and other buildings have been destroyed as 2 bushfires wreak havoc in the South West and Great Southern regions. The injured man was defending his home near Bridgetown. And further south in Denmark, residents fled to evacuation centres as the blaze bore down on the town on Saturday night. Authorities are also keeping a close eye on a 3rd fire near Bruce Rock, east of Perth in the Wheatbelt region. Emergency Services Commissioner Darren Klemm said the intensity of the fires was a result of climate change. He hopes anticipated milder conditions will assist the more than 200 firefighters in bringing the blazes under control today. And if that wasn’t enough for Western Oz’s south, a teenager is recovering in hospital after he was bitten by a shark at Kelp Beds near Esperance yesterday. It’s the same area where a surfer disappeared after being attacked by a shark in 2020, and a teenager was fatally mauled in 2017. 

Australian News

Cleo Smith on the road to healing

Nine’s expensive 60 Minutes interview with the 4yo girl’s mother Ellie Smith and step-dad Jake Gliddon went to air last night, and the pair outlined some of the scary details of October’s abduction. Terence Kelly, the man who has pleaded guilty to snatching Cleo from the family’s tent at the Quobba Blowholes campsite, targeted them because a child’s bike was outside, they said. The wind and noise from the ocean blocked out the sound of the tent zip being opened – first on the adults’ side and then the side where Cleo and her 6-month-old sister were sleeping. Cleo was missing for 18 days before being tracked down to Kelly’s home in Carnarvon. Ellie described her anger at discovering Cleo’s hair had been cut and coloured, but they have not pushed her for details. “Every day and night is different. But she’s OK. She’s happy, she’s bubbly. She’s sad, she’s angry. But she’s getting there.” The family will leave Carnarvon for an extended caravan holiday/scoping tour to find a new place to make a fresh start.

Australian News

Queen Elizabeth reaches 70 years on the throne

Yep, the grand old girl marked her Platinum Jubilee yesterday – that’s 70 years since her father King George VI died, and she took the reins to reign. She’s the first British monarch to celebrate the milestone. In a letter posted on social media, she paid tribute to her husband Prince Philip and expressed her “sincere wish” that her daughter-in-law Camilla be referred to as ‘Queen Consort‘ when Charles gets his go as monarch. “I know you will give him and his wife Camilla the same support that you’ve given me,” she said (which sounds a bit like an instruction, TBH…). Not that QEII is going anywhere – she looked spritely cutting a cake and chatting to Sandringham locals. There are 5 months of jubilee celebrations, culminating in a long weekend in June to celebrate her coronation anniversary.

World News

Cricket’s critical crescendo as coach cedes

Aussie men’s cricket coach Justin Langer resigned on Saturday after rejecting Cricket Australia’s offer of a 6-month contract extension that would take him just past the T20 World Cup in the middle of the year. Langer said he respects the decision to “move in another direction”, and so he’s gaaawn. It’s a bouncer many have taken a swipe at… Langer’s mate/former captain Ricky Ponting said Cricket Australia has stuffed Langer around and botched the exit of former captain Tim Paine after a sexting scandal last year. And fast bowler Mitchell Johnson labelled current captain Pat Cummins as “gutless” and “selfish” for not standing by the coach. Langer came to the role after 2018’s ball-tampering scandal and had the job of restoring the team’s reputation while upping their performance on the field. But his style (aka incessant micromanaging and unpredictable mood swings) put many players and officials offside. Langer’s now in quarantine in Perth having returned home for the first time since October, and assistant coach Andrew McDonald takes his place on an interim basis.


Australia wins gold at the Winter Games

Jakara Anthony was the favourite to win the women’s moguls last night, and it was nerves of steel that saw her take it out. “I really just tried to stay focused on what I needed to do. That was all I could control in the moment,” she said after the race. She’s the 6th Aussie to win Winter Olympics gold and the first to do it in 12 years. You can watch her bumpy/jumpy final run here. Also in the medals was Tess Coady – she claimed bronze in the women’s slopestyle snowboarding event. And it was a fraught Sunday for Aussie mixed doubles curlers Tahli Gill and Dean Hewitt. They bailed out of the competition and started packing their bags after Gill’s 2nd positive COVID test. A last-minute reprieve came through and they went on to beat Switzerland and Canada in their first tournament wins. Phew… And if you’re worried about the Games’ environmental footprint with all the artificial snow, organisers have found one efficiency. Behold the tiny Olympic flame


Apropos of Nothing

Surfing champ Kelly Slater is giving hope to those of a certain age… A week off his 50th birthday, he’s won Hawaii’s Pipeline Pro for the 8th time, calling it “the best win of my life”. He’s in line for another world championship, but the COVID vaccine critic will be unable to compete in many international comps without getting jabbed, including in Oz.

Samantha Jones (aka Kim Cattrall) is unlikely to rejoin her former mates for a spin in …And Just Like That. That’s according to Sarah Jessica Parker, who says there’s “just too much public history of feelings on her part”. Not that they’re leaving her behind altogether

And for your Monday dose of ‘aww’, an animal shelter in Swansea in the UK is teaching a deaf Staffy sign language before going to his forever home. “Most dogs are more in tune with our body language than our constant chitter-chatter,” said trainer Sally Humphries. That won’t stop us from chewing Tucker’s pert ear off

Quirky News

Squiz the Day

3.00pm (AEDT) – Winter Olympics Men’s Snowboard Slopestyle Final – Beijing. Watch out for Aussie Matthew Cox

ABS Data Release – Retail Trade, December 2021 (Additional Information)

Back to school for Queensland kids, after a 2-week delay

Birthdays for singer Garth Brooks (1962) and actor Ashton Kutcher (1978)

Anniversary of:
• the colonial Tasmanian Parliament passing the world’s first secret ballot (1856)
• New Zealand’s worst maritime tragedy, when the HMS Orpheus sunk off the coast of Auckland, killing 189 (1863)
• the Black Saturday bushfires in Victoria, which killed 173 people (2009)

Squiz the Day

The Squiz Archive

Want to check out Squiz Today from the archive?

Get the Squiz Today newsletter

It's a quick read and doesn't take itself too seriously. Get on it.