2022, we had such high hopes – but we’re determined to keep a stiff upper lip despite the headwinds. But we’ve got to say our confidence was shaken with news of a global potato shortage. If that’s not a sign of the end-times, we’re unsure what is…

Also looking to put a more positive foot forward this year is Turkmenistan’s President Gurbanguly Berdymukhamedov (dare you to give that a go…). He’s ordered the extinguishing of the country’s “Gateway to Hell”. Seems sensible…

Mr Darcy and Mr Bingley can drive a robotic car. No, this isn’t some futuristic Jane Austen spin-off – they’re goldfish. Which makes things so much clearer, right?