Squiz Today – Friday, 16 February

SQUIZ SAYINGS

"I was a little bit jealous."

Said Richard Branson of Elon Musk’s rocket. Enough said.

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TURNBULL BANS BOSS-STAFF RELATIONSHIPS

THE SQUIZ
PM Malcolm Turnbull yesterday condemned the chaos that Deputy PM Barnaby Joyce has wrecked upon the government this week. Three things happened:

• He announced that Joyce would take leave next week and wants him to “consider his position”. That makes Joyce unavailable to act as PM while Turnbull is in America for a meeting with US President Donald Trump.

• He criticised Joyce for the “terrible hurt and humiliation” the women involved have suffered.

• He announced an addition to the Code of Conduct that Ministers will be banned from having sexual relations with their staff. That would make future situations like Joyce’s a sackable offence.

I’M SENSING SOME TENSION THERE…
You’re very perceptive. Reports this week have said that Turnbull is really unimpressed with Joyce’s behaviour. But because Joyce is the leader of another party, it’s up to the Nationals to sort him out. The tension between the two hasn’t gone unnoticed – Labor has questioned Turnbull’s confidence in his deputy. That’s a fair question given Turnbull confirmed on Wednesday that Joyce was to be handed the keys to the shop next week.

WHAT HAPPENS NEXT?
Oh gee. Some things to watch for:

• The rafts of commentary about whether Turnbull overreached on what should be private matters/has set an appropriate standard is yet to come.

• The prospect of Joyce keeping his job remains on a wire. But one thing is for sure – a fallout between the two most senior government leaders is very bad indeed.

• What Turnbull’s announcement has probably done is make the media the enforcer of the new rule – so we may see more of these stories.

This one has a lot more distance to travel yet, folks…

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CELEBRATING THE TEAM

PRESENTED BY WOOLWORTHS

You must really like working somewhere to be there for 40 years... This week four ladies from the Woolies Innisfail celebrated that very milestone. That's a lot of shelves stocked, items zapped and customers looked after.

Woolworths prides itself on the opportunities it provides its 200,000+ people. Whether it's a young person's first job or training managers, Woolies' ambition is to recruit and develop a team that reflects the Australian community.

To find out more about working at Woolworths, check out WOW Careers here. 

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SQUIZ THE REST

FLORIDA SCHOOL SHOOTING
This time the shooter was an expelled student returning to kill 17 people and wound 15 more. It’s the worst school shooting in Florida history – which is a horrifyingly specific category. All authorities would say is that the accused shooter, Nikolas Cruz, had been expelled from Marjory Stoneman Douglas High in Parkland, South Florida for disciplinary reasons. Cruz blended in with the campus’s 3,200 students to make a getaway but police later arrested him. Students said Cruz was “a loner obsessed with weapons”. He is expected to appear in court today.

ZUMA GONE
Over the last few weeks, South Africa's ruling ANC party has been piling on the pressure to force President Jacob Zuma to go. In the end, it was the threat of facing a vote of no confidence in the parliament that prised him from the top job. Zuma, who is currently facing corruption charges, has been president since 2009. Cyril Ramaphosa - a favourite of Nelson Mandela - has been installed as the new president.

And while we’re in the region, there was sad news yesterday that former Zimbabwean opposition leader Morgan Tsvangirai has died from colon cancer. In 2008 he won more votes than longtime president Robert Mugabe but withdrew from a runoff when his supporters were targeted with violence from the ruling regime. He was 65yo.

MORE JOBS IN JANUARY
Are you finding your new year’s optimism and enthusiasm waning? Time to get a new job? There are some new roles out there. The official stats show unemployment fell by 0.1% to 5.5% in January. And 16,000 new jobs were added in the month (note: full-time jobs were down, but there was a big boost in part-time roles) - that marks a record 16 months of uninterrupted jobs growth. Political types were taking all the credit yesterday. Typical.

AVON CALLING… TO SAY GOODBYE
The iconic cosmetics brand sold door-to-door/by the lady round the corner has decided to leave Australia and New Zealand by the end of the year. One of the world's largest direct selling companies, reports say more than 20,000 people sell Avon around the country right now. But the company said it needs to focus on sustainable profits and growth markets. The end of an era.

ANOTHER AUSSIE WINTER OLYMPICS MEDAL
It turns out we’re pretty good at this skiing caper. Yesterday Jarryd Hughes claimed second place for Australia in the snowboard cross. That’s the one where a bunch of crazy people take off down an icy track together and fight it out over jumps and bumps to the finish line. It’s kinda like the Hunger Games on a snowboard… minus the murder. And while Jarryd took out silver, his dad Darren's reaction was gold.

FRIDAY LITES – THREE THINGS WE LIKED THIS WEEK
What better sums up modern-day love than Tinder? Nothing, that's what. Please enjoy Vanity Fair’s Tinder Takeover – where a comedian takes over a stranger’s account. Giggles ensue.

An Olympic national uniform and costume retrospective. Love the ice-skater in a tie and wool pants.

It's been a big week at The Squiz - we've made an addition to the team! So after our first week together it would be easy to think these tips on office etiquette are targeted at an audience of one. It's not. Truly. (Sound convincing?)

SQUIZ THE DAY

Friday

Chinese New Year (Year of the Dog)

National Multicultural Festival – Canberra (on until Sunday)

35th anniversary of the Ash Wednesday bushfires in Victoria and South Australia

Saturday

7.00pm (local time) - White Night Melbourne

Greek Festival of Sydney (on until Sunday)

Sunday

International Asperger's Day