Squiz Today – Monday, 12 February

SQUIZ SAYINGS

“Food allergy bullying”

That’s what upcoming movie Peter Rabbit has been accused of. Apparently Peter and his mates attack an enemy with an allergen. But anaphylaxis groups say it is not a joke. Spoiler alert - it's all ok, an EpiPen was handy.

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NORTH KOREAN SCHMOOZE-FEST MAKES FOR AWKWARD MOMENTS

THE SQUIZ
North Korean leader Kim Jong Un has extended an invitation to South Korean President Moon Jae-in to come over the border for talks. The handwritten note was delivered by Kim’s sister, Kim Yo Jong, who met with Moon while visiting for the Winter Olympics in South Korea’s PyeongChang. Moon was non-committal saying he wanted to “create the environment for that to be able to happen” and hoped the North would “actively pursue” dialogue with the US. Hashtag awkward.

SO WHY ISN’T THAT A STEP FORWARD?
North Korea has form on using the Olympics to sweet-talk the world. The US, Japan and others are sceptical there’s any real change on offer, like North Korea abandoning its nuclear power ambitions. So they want to keep the pressure on via harsh sanctions. But it has been noticed that Kim Yo Jong (who is the first member of the ruling family to visit the South since 1953 and has been described as North Korea’s answer to Ivanka Trump) and the Hermit Kingdom’s 240-strong cheer squad are working hard to put a smiling face on the regime.

AND HOW ARE THE WINTER OLYMPICS GOING?
The opening ceremony on Friday night has been described as one of the best. That's probably in no small part due to Tonga's Pita Taufatofua turning up shirtless yet again (in -1C temperatures would you mind) and the fact that South Korean cultural icon Psy’s Gangnam Style also got a go. A review of the high and low points is here. As for the Aussies, three of our contenders have made finals. In the women’s moguls, Jakara Anthony and Britt Cox finished fourth and fifth respectively last night. And Matt Graham is up for the men’s moguls final tonight.

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SQUIZ THE REST

MENSINK LIVING IT UP IN EUROPE
It’s the closest thing we’ve seen since the ‘Race for Skase’. The Aussie media’s ‘Clamber for Clive’ has seen News Corp track down Clive Mensink, the fugitive nephew of businessman and former pollie, Clive Palmer. And life looks pretty good for the absconder. Mensink has been on the run for more than a year after the collapse of Queensland Nickel, the company that went under in 2016 leaving 800 people out of work and huge debts. Mensink was the sole-director of the company at the time. Palmer says he doubts it’s Mensink because the pictures show a much slimmer man. News Corp has notified authorities of Skinny Mensink’s location.

JOYCE SAGA HAS SOME WAY TO GO YET…
Sorry, but the Barnaby Joyce saga continues… The wagons are circling on his leadership with reports this morning that some Nationals MPs are unsettled after receiving white-hot anger from party members and constituents over the breakdown of Joyce's marriage and impending parenthood with former staffer Vikki Campion. Labor says there are legitimate questions to be answered about Campion's employment and the couples’ use of government entitlements. Points though to those trying to get the focus on business tax cuts…

WELFARE CRACKDOWN PAYING DIVIDENDS
After all the bad reviews the Turnbull Government received over its crackdown on welfare since the election, Human Services Minister Michael Keenan yesterday said the effort saved taxpayers $1.4 billion in dodgy and erroneous payments. "It shows you that we are actually serious about making sure that people only get what they're entitled to," he said. You’d have to think that $1.4 billion would go a long way to covering the phone bills and time of those who waited on hold to Centrelink to clarify their payments…

QUICK WORLD NEWS WRAP
ISRAEL TARGETS SYRIA - Israel launched its largest attacks on Syrian targets in decades after it found what it says was an Iranian drone on its border with Syria. One of its fighter jets was shot down over northern Israel during the offensive. PM Benjamin Netanyahu says he won’t stand for Iran violating Israel’s sovereignty.

TERRIBLE ACCIDENTS – Sadly there are three from the weekend to mention:

• In Indonesia, 25 people were killed on a trip to thermal springs in Java on Saturday.

• In Hong Kong, 19 people died in a bus accident. It’s said to be one of the city’s worst traffic incidents in years.

• And overnight in Moscow, a plane crashed just after take-off. Authorities think all 71 onboard have perished and investigators are at the scene.

OXFAM UNDER PRESSURE – The UK government is reviewing its funding to the charity following revelations that aid workers used prostitutes in Haiti in 2011. Chief executive Mark Goldring said he wishes they’d handled it better and been more transparent.

MYER IN THE MIRE
The retailer confirmed on Friday that trading from July to December last year sucked. That’s a technical business term to describe the 41% drop in profit the company is likely to suffer for the period. Part of that was driven by a slump in Boxing Day sales – something CEO Richard Umbers says is due to the aggressive discounting across retailers. The watch out: expect shareholders Solomon Lew and Premier Investments to go for the jugular.

AN OBITUARY TO MAKE YOU SMILE
The passing of a loved one can cause a lot of angst when it comes to memorialising them. Just ask Sarah Jessica Parker and Kim Cattrall… But this obituary made strangers miss a man they’d never met after it went mad on the interwebs. “Terry Wayne Ward, age 71, of DeMotte, IN, escaped this mortal realm on Tuesday, January 23rd, 2018, leaving behind 32 jars of Miracle Whip, 17 boxes of Hamburger Helper and multitudes of other random items that would prove helpful in the event of a zombie apocalypse,” his daughter wrote. Who doesn't need a smile this Monday?

SQUIZ THE DAY

10.00am (AEDT) - First Public Hearings of the Royal Commission into Misconduct in the Banking, Superannuation and Financial Services Industry - Melbourne

12.00pm (AEDT) - Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull and Labor Leader Bill Shorten to deliver statements on the 10th report card on 'Closing the Gap' initiatives relating to Indigenous wellbeing - Canberra

12.30pm (AEDT) - Former PM Kevin Rudd to address the National Press Club on ‘The 10th Anniversary of the National Apology to Indigenous Australians’ - Canberra